Friday we had my mother over for dinner. I baked Trout and did a rice pilaf and steamed broccoli. I got my friend’s and family’s christmas cards done on Saturday and mailed them out Sunday. We also tried to go skating. Got the skates sharpened but the Saturday free-skate at Envista was cancelled. BOO. SO we went for a walk in Lemoine’s and fed the birds. Evie and I also made my favourite treat-bars that June used to make when she baked. They’re a Ritz-Skor-SweetCondesnsed Milk and chill bar. Very easy, no bake. Then Sunday we had mass, obvs, then met ROB at my parents for breakfast. Then we shot over to Kingsdale to have Christmas Lunch with June and Ann Marie’s dad/aunt/uncle. Then home for the night where Charlotte and I worked on her Brochure for social studies in “Daddy’s software”. She was very excited to be shown what I do for a living and she made the brochure all by herself. I just told her how to use it. She did the clicking and typing.
I hate corporatism.
cancer with a pretty face
take your wealth to another place
bank accounts that you cant touch
you wont miss it that much
every life they touch they destroy
old woman little boy
doesn’t matter what your age
you’ll never earn a decent wage
Selfish humans.
it aint me and it aint you
its just the way humans do
when it comes down to it yeah
we’re the worst
you can only count on us to put ourselves first
Virginal villainy.
you can’t play the virgin and the villain
but you think you can, yeah you do.
I can’t say absolutely or for certain
what people think of you, but I know what I do.
knowing everybody wants and your the only one who’s gots
makes you feel good, don’t it.
you said you were powerless to stop it
but you wanted it, so own it.
CHORUS
I can say but I know that you know this
you hurt people just in case you didn’t notice
I thought we were in love
but I guess that I was wrong.
Your step dad touched you and your mom calls you a whore, no I get it.
That’s only going to stop you from getting what you want if you let it.
Loyalty is a word you’ve never heard before
I see that, now.
and you and me was clearly a joke but
I don’t see, how.
CHORUS
I know now but I need for you to know this
you hurt people even if you never notice, yeah
I see now for you ‘in love’
is just a song.
I’ve taken three minutes of your time
so that I could make you hear me
there’s no difference between asking me to go
and forcing me to leave
all you had to do was tell me it’s over
and you wanted to be with him
but making sure i came home to walk in on
you’s got to be a sin
now i don’t care that you regret it
or you called it a mistake
this is a relationship baby
you can’t have and eat your cake
what i want to make clear before the curtain closes
in-love for me is not sunshine and roses
but after what you did to me
i’m sure that it’s over.
disconnect to witness reality.
the curious clergy inventing metallurgy
chain mail and plate spreading obedience with rage
centuries later forming circles of uranium
minerals to electricity opens minds to chemotherapy
hundred years from now I’m wondering how
treating sick with radiation or chemical sedation
might look to a generation with a future education
the age of ignorance passes as a new age dawns
while you were sleeping kings and bishops turned us into pawns
you might have been too why don’t you think for yourself?
your heads up your ass with your eyes on your cell
inconceivable vastness to computation unending
no information evades our new understanding
and while we were praying up to God with his eyes looking down
the worlds been flooded by satellites and cellular phones
existence is change and in constant flux
whats true one minute may not be the next
and remember that minutes were invented by man
all life is an illusion see through if you can.
we can do anything we as a species will truth
put a human being on Mars if thats what we want to do
invent new technology to help us take stride
new tools for building or helping save lives
quantum linking starts me thinking
atoms formed in stars connected so far
like the pathways life forms in our mind
interstellar thought with no regard for time
our entire galaxy could be one mind.
once we were the axis but now we spin round
heaven in the sky and hell underground
discovery from ideas from vivid daydreaming
my ideas are theories until they’re disproven
i see more great arks in our future voyage
entire generations spent traversing the void
bringing our life as we know it to those distant stars
a fantastic beginning i think unto mars
Why does it have to mean something?
why does it have to mean something?
music is but a metaphor for how i think.
if only you knew how much i cheated in my mind.
how many people I’ve mentally strangled in my time.
I’m only human just like you. I’d do evil if I could get away with it. Just like you.
my life’s been perfect but i pray for strife
just to feel more than nothing all the time.
life is so safe it’s sterile. the excitement in me has died.
Sorry. (May 22, 2014)
I’m not in this fight
I just don’t feel right
I’m sad. Or stressed
My eyes no light
Give me something
I won’t complain
Just need to test it
try anything.
You ask me to move
Easy for you
I must confess
my thoughts are cruel
Walls close in
I know I’ve sinned
no time for that
my shoulders pinned.
I’m drowning all time
hurting people in my life
spiteful words bitter thoughts
I’m not me they’re not mine
Begging for help.
Touch, taste, can’t tell.
I don’t know what to ask
for told this hell.
Stuff that might be
Things may have been
All over the map
I can’t let you in
Erratic at best
What I say and do
Imagine in my head
what I see looks like to you
Circus tent big top
Falling down. Can’t stop
No net to catch me this time
Pill bottle. In time. Not for my mind.
I feel like I’m drowning all the time
hurting all the people in my life
spiteful words and bitter thoughts
I’m not me and they’re not mine
mountain foot can’t trust your heart
Emotions dulled. Impossible start.
Quick moves says life. Slow brain down no.
Race lost. Starts gone. Curtain up. No show.
bad times.
i thought I wanted you but that wasn’t it
I chased after you for three months and a bit
I had you where I wanted you and couldn’t commit
I had to let you go now I feel like shit
It felt to good to be bad
it was the thrill of the hunt
didn’t mean to make you mad
why you being a… mean girl…
music history.
guitar when i was 16.
learned to play some chords
hung out with my friends
played some songs when we were bored
guitar got put on the shelf
i got older made my life
got my first acoustic just before marrying my wife
in the night i strummed some chords but i was quiet and alone
just a simple way to pass the hours past midnight in my home
when i was 29 i decided to give it a real shot took lessons and practiced a lot
i met my friend dustin he had a band said i could play the bass cuz they needed a hand
played on stage for the first time
my knees were a chatter but we played well and had a good time.
Kind of angry with pop music…
That hair, not real.
those clothes, chosen for them.
that smile, it’s real.
but it’s not for you.
it’s like, falling in love with plastic.
we can make it, anyway you want it.
we can even make, you think you can’t live without it.
but in the end, you just fell in love with plastic.
they sing a song, straight into your heart.
that song was written 1 billion teenage hearts
Brains to Byzantium 