Water, water, every where, nor any drop to drink.

Brook is another girl in my program. She’s a big pot head. She is the nicest soul you’ll ever encounter thought. She and I are friends, but not too much more. She seems to be Lisa’s sounding board, so it’s hard to say what I should treat her like. I do believe that she knows everything about my and Lisa’s escapades. She is living in Cat Woods. Her ad her room mates are all dopers. So I steer clear for the most part. The next time I smoke weed I’m heading over that way.

Kelly {The one that got away.} is a sweetheart. Probably my favourite ‘joke around with’ friend. We are really close. We argue a lot about meaningless things. We just happen to have very opposing views of the world. She stays in reality, fact and an almost scientific state of mind. While I explore the paranormal, possibilities, and philosophical. In Kelly’s and my case opposites do not attract. {Yes they do you’re just to naive at 17 to see it.} 

Then there is Kelly {Another Kelly that doesn’t matter.} A beautiful lady who I met in photography. She is joining the transfers to our program from gen arts and sci in January. Which will make her very possibly open season for my next love. {Play on playa.} It is hard to say if i like or dislike her because I barely know her. {Very astute.} I know that she went to high school near Markham {Adorably spelt Marcum in my journal. No google maps in 1999 and fuck atlases, right?!} I would like to know more but she is quiet. It is hard enough to talk to a girl privately in such a large class and even harder when she is so closed off. {I probably meant shy… my younger self is so hard on people.} She goes on breaks with me and walks around but as soon as class is over she boots it back to res. I tried to call her tonight but it seems like she is not in. {Seems I did spend some time with this girl I don’t remember. Also, all this calling seems semi- creepy now in 2016 when everything is done via text.}

Anyways as I finish this book which has taken me two years to compile I will read it over and contemplate my actions, my rights and wrongs. {18 years later in 2016.} 

One thing I must always see as a right is Jeff and Chad’s friendship. The were there as soon as I broke up with Emily. They waited. They were my friends for the entire five months that I thought they hated me. {More on that here.} They obviously had some resentment but that’s understandable.

The end of this book signifies the end of Emily. {Really? First loves are like embers in a fire pit the morning after. Hot coals can lay under layers of cool ash. One only needs poke them with a stick to see they still burn.} The start of the new book is a fresh start into the next few years of my life.

I do not know what I will do with this book. {You keep it in a wooden box your dad brought back from Haiti.} I may keep it to read when I am older. I may give it to my son when he is old enough to hear and deal with everything that I had to go through. {Ok you little male chauvinist. I find it amusing that I am transcribing this on the day of my vasectomy… my life complete with two amazing daughters.} 

Or maybe it will help to remind me of how my parents treated my through all of this and I will learn and use all my mistakes to be a better person. A better father. {Woah. Mind fuck.}

{Marginalia} Although dads a tough act to follow I won’t be following old Herbert for at least 10 years. {Yeah you almost went into the reg force… then you met Ann Marie.}

Alien Bat Men


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