June 8, 1999.

Hey Drew,

Ummmm … … let me think. You’re doing great so far you know. You don’t seem at all nervous. Wow! You make me so proud.

I quite frankly feel bad about your “break up” with Jeff. I just don’t think you would be doing this if it weren’t for me. Obviously Jeff has changed but do you think you would be going along with it if it were not for me? I just feel bad I guess. Does this “breakup” include Chad as well? I am just wondering because it’s going to make the situation very difficult  if you are no longer friends with Jeff but remain friends with Chad. You must know that no matter what you decide I will support you. I have put a lot of thought into whether or not I am willing and able to be around them. It was uncomfortable this morning when you said I would have to learn to be around Jeff. I felt threatened. Even if I ignored him it would be very uncomfortable to be around him anyways and if you think about it, it would be hard on you too. I don’t want you to ever think that I would give you an ultimatum. I would never do that to you. The reason i felt it would be better to talk to Jeff in person is that it is more personally. You guys have a tight history and I was thinking it would be best in person. However, it would be very difficult and it could possibly start something. I really don’t know now which you should do.

It’s up to you and i trust your judgement. I’m sorry for getting upset this morning. It’s just that I really need you today and I felt I was being ditched for Jeff at a time when you knew I needed you. I guess I was just hurt and disappointed. I’m okay now thought. I’m just not having a good day. Well I don’t know if you are going to appreciate this letter and i would have liked to make it more positive but I’m just not in a positive state of mind. Talk to you soon.

I love you,


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