They had sex right beside me!

{Undated.}

The emptiness and loneliness are sometimes too much to bear. I don’t seem to fit in anywhere. I’m accepted in places but the uncomfortable atmosphere sets in and makes me feel out of place.

Jeff and Chad, the two I thought I would never lose, were instantly lost as of the moment they were officially off the market. It’s like, OK, we have girlfriends, what do we need Andrew around for? {Remember this when I get my first serious girlfriend.} I understand in a way. I give them friendship and fun times, goofing around and everything. But then you see their girlfriends who can give them everything that my friendship offered and they have tits. {Classy Drew.} That’s all it boils down to. They wouldn’t feel comfortable making out in front of me so they just don’t talk to me. That way I won’t have to go with them. {In one way this semester was rough because Jeff and Chad were gone. In retrospect it was only because of this that I started spending so much time with Emily.} 

On the other extreme, we have Jed, who offers me whatever I want; alcohol, drugs, parties and pussy. I don’t feel comfortable with it. {What’s the matter with you!? Seriously. Dude.} It’s like women are possessions to him. {Sort of… he just wanted sex.} I had to leave tonight because if I stayed I’d have passed out and gotten raped by skanky-ass sluts he’s always trying to hook me up with. {I don’t think I can offer anything more to that beautiful paragraph. LOL}

Last night I was high as fuck, laying beside Pickles {We were all tripping out on the bed … or so I thought.} and I realize that Jed, not 6 inches away from me, is fucking Jamie (her house). Right beside me, he was drunk, she was drunk, and I was high. I thought I was fucking seeing things or hallucinating or something. But as much as I wanted it to be a figment of my imagination it was not. {omg! I remember that. Ew. It was very, very real.} I had to get out but I didn’t want to embarrass them so I stayed there, shut the hell up, and tried to get back to sleep. I have never been more uncomfortable in my life. {I’d say that is probably still true. At least in my top three.}

Guy Joint

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