Natalie is back!

{Undated}

Let’s see, uhm, Natalie, the once love-of-my-life, {I throw love-of-my-life around a lot in my youth. Points for passion, deductions for inaccuracy. I’ve since known great love and, as I’ve aged, I’ve abandoned making blanket statements. The world has become grey to me where once everything was either black or white. There’s so much I don’t know; past, present or future.} has made herself into the most torturous, unforgiving creature. For no reason {I’m sure the reason was that you made out with Katrina while you were dating her. Add to that that Jeff told her the truth before you did. Then finish it off with you dumping her. Good enough reason, dummy? I’ve now lived long enough to fully understand the adage, ‘hell hath no fury like a woman’s scorn’. And you, my arrogant friend, will learn as you scorn one after another in the years to come.} she showed messages I sent her when I trusted her to Jeff about how Joel was and is my real best friend and how I thought he was nothing more than an annoyance. Obviously all lies. {Pretty sure I was venting to her about how all my friends were being assholes around the same time as the last entry. No matter what it was I’m sure it was out of context and was said in anger.} But I did say that stuff. But it was at a time I was pissed at Jeff. {Yeah, see I was right. Context.} I know I care about Jeff because when he was pissed at me it hurt, and when I found out why he was it just a lot more. This proves how much of a friend he is and how much he means to me.

Anyways, she’s out of my life. I sent all her shit back to her, with a formal apology. {What I wouldn’t give for a copy of that letter!} and request never to see her again. {Can you imagine the ignorant gold that would be in that letter?! I’m wrecked. She probably, rightly, shredded it. I’ll never know. I lost touch with Natalie.} I thought it was stupid but someone has to be the mature one and after all that she did to hurt me I doubt it would have been her. he he {Classy bro. Real classy.}

I got the job at RMC after getting jerked around and roads and grounds. {My mother was a civilian staffing officer and she gave me a job. The government refers to that as a conflict of interest. Of course nepotism in endemic in the public service so why was I different? Someone my mom worked with had it out for her and reported her. Once exposed it had to be undone. I wasn’t too upset. In the first week I had gotten a sunburn, had blisters all over my hands and feet and had broken two lawn mowers and a weed whacker. I learned from that job that manual labour was not for me. Lesson learned. Seek my fortune elsewhere! Luckily my father knew someone at RMC so I nepotism’d my way into another job.} But it’s coolio, cuz my mom is calling a formal inquiry on the bitch that pulled me around. I may get full compensation from the whole summer, plus what I’ve already worked and what I’ve missed. {Yeah, no.}

Einstein’s theory : Light is faster than time. Travel faster than light and you travel faster than time. {Again, no. Didn’t you drop physics?}

I have a confession to make. I’m a little high right now. I smoked a bowl on Little B {I named my bongs. I am pretty sure I just copied this practice from the movie Half Baked. Now I want to get high. Be right back.} just a second ago.

Anyways, Later. 

PS Yes, I am turning into a pothead. {Turning into? 😉 My 35 year old, pot filled brain agrees that you are long gone my friend.}

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